Posted by Leslie S. Goldberg, M.Ed., CEP on Wed, Jul 21, 2010
No, this blog is not about a new concept for a high school. Nor is it about getting intoxicated in the woods. “Wilderness high” is the incredible feeling that participants with a successful wilderness experience feel upon completion of a specialized outdoor therapeutic experience. The feelings of confidence and competence, the feelings of “can do” rather than “can’t do”, the feelings of excitement and optimism… the transformation is simply amazing for these students who had prior feelings of hopelessness and helplessness before participating.
As an educational consultant for 25 years, I have seen the growth and changes in the industry, but the power of this experience 
remains the same. There are some down sides, however, to this incredible sense of power when leaving such a program. Since wilderness cannot last forever, participants must necessarily move on to a longer term therapeutic program, a school, or home. Please don’t misunderstand; this is not a bad thing, but parents, adolescents and young adults must realize that they will be the “newbies” at the next step, whatever that looks like. For example, if it is a therapeutic program or a new school, the student will typically begin at the bottom of the social and academic ladders, having to gain respect and privileges all over again. If they are going back home or to a former school they will have to work doubly hard to “prove” themselves.
A barrier to success? Absolutely not! A challenge? Sure. This transition is actually a life skill that everyone will experience when entering a new job, school/college, or relationship. The most important lesson is that this occurrence is inevitable and the more preparation on the part of the student and the family, the better. There will be no surprises when the honeymoon period wears off and the reality may induce some brief regression and old behaviors. If we are all prepared for this, however, we can remind ourselves that this is, in fact, what we knew would occur and that it will be over quickly if we, the collective transition team (students with parents, educational consultants, therapists, etc.), handle it collaboratively and productively.
Posted by Adam R. Goldberg, M.Ed. on Mon, Mar 29, 2010
Dad was failing rapidly and needed a new kidney. The world stopped. Nothing else mattered. We came together...
Enter team #1, a hospital whose philosophy and practice revolved around looking to our family's decision-making process: "Which of the three sons (all anatomical matches) would step up to be the donor?" "How would we manage the period leading up to the transplant?" "How would we handle the recovery period?" All good questions and perfectly rational... that is, if we were not in crisis and were thinking completely clearly.
Enter team #2, a different hospital team which anticipated that we would not be thinking clearly and advised us accordingly: "Based on our experience, here's what's going to happen..." "The following are things you probably have not thought of yet, but that you need to know, no matter how hard to hear." "Based on our assessment, here's who should be the donor and why." Big, big difference.
Why do I bring this up? It dawned on me the other day that this is exactly what prospective clients are weighing when they are in a bind with their struggling child. In crisis, people need conviction and experience since they cannot be expected to rationalize every step on their own.
I've been there. I'd like to think that those in my family are loving, sensitive, rational, intelligent, and problem-solving above all... but, you can throw that all out the window when a crisis takes hold (even when some of those family members are in crisis educational consulting themselves!).
For the families who reach out to us, they are doing so for good reason. Most have been directed by other professionals or former clients who have been there as well and know in hindsight from their own tribulations that they need that level of conviction and experience to make it through.
In case you're wondering, our family is doing well several years later. On most days, we even forget what we went through. Imagine that...
Posted by Joshua C. Doyle, M.Ed. on Mon, Mar 22, 2010
Over a year ago I started taking a new approach to visiting wilderness therapy programs. Rather than simply visiting the administrative office or taking a quick trip out into the field to observe a group of kids, I wanted to experience first hand what it was like to go through the program itself. 
Now when I visit wilderness therapy programs I usually spend the night in the field with the staff and students in a group. The lack of distractions and the chance to "unplug" from the world is, in my opinion, an absolute luxury. During one of my more recent visits to a wilderness therapy program out west I took the opportunity to visit two young men whose parents I had recently advised.
When the students found out that I was there to spend the night in the field they were rather shocked that I would be crazy enough to subject myself to high desert terrain during the winter season. Despite what was viewed initially as temporary insanity, my stay in those conditions earned me a kernel of credibility.
The highlight of the trip for me was sitting down with the students for whom I had actually recommended placement earlier in their process. Normally I participate in regular communications with their therapists by phone, but it was amazing to be present to witness their sessions live. I had a whole new appreciation for how productive and meaningful the meetings were and felt validated that my students were experiencing the power of the wilderness I had described prior to their enrollment.
The funniest part of the experience was calling the parents after my visit to the field to inform them of where I had been for the preceding 24 hours. It took quite a bit of convincing that I went to see their child in the high desert by choice. Of course, after answering the deluge of questions, I spent the rest of the time assuring them that their child was warm, well cared for, smiling, eating well, and on the way to emotionally healthier living.
Talk about the perfect get-away...
Posted by Joshua C. Doyle, M.Ed. on Mon, Jan 04, 2010
Oftentimes I meet with parents of an at risk child who know conceptually that some sort of intervention is required. However, their heart isn't there yet.
They want to believe that, because their child has not hit rock bottom at that point, there is still some hope. This, for instance, can hold true for a child who suffers from depression or other inward-directed emotions. If that child is physically present, parents can often convince themselves things will turn for the better because they can protect their child and are convinced that, as problem-solvers themselves, they can control the situation.
This is not always the case, however, for a child who is either overtly abusing substance(s) or is directing behaviors outward through defiance or rage. The problems *appear* much more acute and parents can feel as though they have no other choice but to act.
In the former case, if a child is spending 14 hours per day gaming on the Internet, the parent may rationalize that at least that child appears happy and is engaged in something seemingly innocuous. Similarly, the child who is severely depressed and doesn't want to leave the home may make the parent feel that the only place he/she feels "safe" and "wanted" is home under their care.
The sad truth is that, more often than not, parents are enabling their children because they fear loss of love as a consequence of intervening. A child can often falsely empower parents by appealing that he/she will never be happy leaving home and that trust and understanding is at stake. Unfortunately, this empowerment is really just masked manipulation.
Needless to say parents want their children to love them... however, the cost of wanting their children to love them while they are suffering pales in comparison to the devastating costs associated with losing them in the long run.
So, when parents ask in exasperation, "Will my child ever love me again?" my answer can be hard for them to hear. I explain to them that their child will in all likelihood make it clear to them up-front that the answer will be no... today. However, over time as healing takes hold, those parents will eventually see the longer-term gains of building a love that perhaps did not even exist at that level before.
Let us know what you have experienced...
Posted by Hannah Cleveland on Mon, Dec 28, 2009
As Intake Coordinator, I frequently find myself speaking to a parent with a child in crisis. Every child presents a unique case, but the descriptions I hear often include some combination of the following...defiant, dependent, anxious, depressed, angry, disengaged, struggling, at-risk. I am inundated with countless Dx/Rx profiles from A to Z.
In addition to describing our services and fees, I strive to give these families a sense of hope for a positive outcome. This is easy for me to say, but I recognize that the words may sound hollow to a parent whose angst may be complicated by feelings of guilt, hopelessness, and desperation. Although there are never guarantees when working with difficult issues and complex family dynamics, I want parents to understand that there are a myriad of opportunities for high-impact change.
Specialized schools and programs that once didn't exist to families in crisis are now staffed with some of the most dedicated and credentialed practitioners in the country. When our educational consulting team has had an opportunity to help identify and match complex needs with the appropriate expertise and setting, the outcomes have been beyond what I would have ever expected. In the end, it's all about finding the right fit and therefore getting it right the first time... and that is where the role of a proven educational consulting team comes into play.
We hear from parents of current and former clients, almost on a daily basis, who are ecstatic to see their son or daughter on the path to a healthy and happy future, something they never would have believed possible at one point in the past.
So folks, there is a light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.
Click for more on our positive outcomes...
Posted by Karen Plescia, M.S. on Tue, Dec 22, 2009
I would like to humbly recommend that college and university admission offices everywhere make a decision when a student applies to their institutions. Do away with deferrals. Say "yes" or say "no." Apply this policy to candidates who apply under any one of the half dozen or so decision options available to them: early admission, early decision, early decision II, early action, rolling admission, rolling early action, restricted early action, rolling admission, or good-old-fashioned regular decision.
Particularly with early decision, students are required by colleges and universities, essentially, to make a decision as they apply that they will attend that institution if given the opportunity. If the applicants wish to defer making that decision, they do not apply under the early decision option. (In most cases) It's simple. Yes or no.
It is a fairly significant statement if a 17- or 18-year-old puts themselves out there by applying early decision. They are reticent to make a public statement of commitment without knowing if the sentiment is mutual. No one likes to take the risk of being rejected by someone (or someplace) they "love." Adolescents avoid this rejection like the plague. Most of the high school seniors with whom I work opt, instead, for the (in their minds) "safer" early action option to fulfill the current social obligation of knowing where they will go to college by Christmas.
So when they do make public their love for a particular college by applying under an early decision option, it seems only fair that the college respect that risk by replying with a definitive response. Instead, year after year, my colleagues - both independent and school-based counselors - and I try to explain to bewildered and heart-broken students and their families why an institution is asking them to hang on a while longer for an actual decision.
After commiserating with them over their disappointment, the conversation usually goes something like this:
ME: "Your credentials weren't as competitive within the early decision applicant pool as they would have liked."
STUDENT: "So then why didn't they just reject me?"
ME: "Because there are so many wonderful things about you that they still feel there may be a place in their class for you."
STUDENT: "So then why didn't they just admit me?"
ME: "They admit the very best of the best applicants under early decision and because it's so competitive, you may have just fallen a little short."
STUDENT: "So after all of this, they could still say ‘no' if the regular decision application pool is competitive, too?"
ME: "Yes, that's correct. But they could also say ‘yes'"
‘Round and ‘round I go with the student a few more times and the parents twice as often. The conversation usually ends with no less angst on the part of the student and the family despite my efforts to convince this young person that life itself has not yet ended. The student mutters that "it" would be so much easier if he just knew if one way or the other. I can't help but agree. It's supposed to be an early decision. Not an early wait-and-see. If they don't quite measure up, cut the cord and let these poor kids move on to plan B. Otherwise, throw your arms open, be excited they loved your institution enough to take a risk, and start cultivating that engaged student and eventual happy alum.
Let us know what you think...
Posted by Joshua C. Doyle, M.Ed. on Fri, Sep 11, 2009
When is the last time someone had anything even remotely positive to say about homework? Everyone has or has had it. No one really likes it, but we have all needed to do it. 
The debate continues as to whether homework really helps a student with academics or is better levied as a vehicle for teaching time management and responsibility. Who knows? That's for another day. One thing I can report from my vantage point is that there is seemingly a strong correlation between parental over-involvement in homework and parent-child acrimony.
If I were king for a day, I would rule that parents CANNOT exert too much muscle in assisting with homework - that goes for the process and discipline as well as the homework content itself. Let me be clear... I see no problem if children occasionally ask their parent(s) specific questions about their homework, but that prompt needs to come from them. And, periodic participation is one thing; letting homework dominate evening or weekend routines is a recipe for disaster.
One thing to realize is that the most well-intentioned, patient, and competent parents can prove to be the worst homework helpers for their children. Parents obviously want their children to do well, but oftentimes helping them in the wrong ways can manifest in enablement. Sooner or later, with a new source of friction, bickering and fighting between parents and children over homework can drive their relationship in a toxic direction.
Did you ever imagine that your relationship with your child would be in turmoil over something as trivial as long division? Life is way too short and precious to let something like that come between you and the child you love... But, like many other sources of angst, if left unaddressed, every day can become a struggle. Homework sessions essentially become Epic War Battles and end like Greek Tragedies.
When you are insistent on helping your child with their homework, take some time and consider if you are really part of the solution or are actually part of creating a bigger problem.
Please feel welcome to share your reactions...
Posted by Leslie S. Goldberg, M.Ed., CEP on Sun, Aug 23, 2009
When parents call for help with a child, adolescent, or young adult they are often in crisis and we first and foremost need to determine if we are the right people to assist them. Do they need crisis intervention; do they need a therapeutic wilderness program; do they need a therapeutic boarding school or a residential treatment program; or do they need a young adult program? Do they need a medical facility? Do they need an intervention? Some families may just need to hear some local resources, wherever they are, if they cannot afford to place their child. Do they need some advocacy services to assist them with funding or IEP issues? Once we have tweaked out that kind of information and if they agree to engage our services, we do all of our due diligence and come up with a plan.
Sometimes the plan involves a two-step process with a short term program for a couple of months followed by a longer term school or therapeutic program. Parents are extremely eager and anxious to know all that they can and want to know the long term plan right at the beginning. More often than not, we cannot give them the long term plan until the shorter term program along with clinically sophisticated testing and the 24/7 observation, therapy, and assessment are well underway. Sometimes I really wish I had a crystal ball, but without the weekly calls and reports as well as the careful and thorough test interpretation, the view from that crystal ball may not even be accurate!
We acknowledge that this can be very difficult for parents. Therefore, we do everything we can to help them with this rationale. Although it would certainly be easier for consultants and a heck of a lot less work to come up with the two step process at the beginning, it is not always in the best interest of the child, adolescent, or young adult, and that to us at the Goldberg Center is the most important goal.
Let us know what you think...
Posted by Joshua C. Doyle, M.Ed. on Thu, Jun 11, 2009
During my years directing Admissions at a boarding school for adolescents with Learning Differences (LD), I received hundreds of frantic calls from parents whose children had just been diagnosed with LD and were looking for an immediate school placement. Yet, as I started to ask more questions, I often found that a good portion of these children also presented with clinical levels of depression, anxiety, substance abuse, and behavioral problems.
It was with a heavy heart that I had to tell the parents of these students that, although the school that I represented was designed to assist adolescents with LD, but due to their child's additional emotional/behavioral issues, I could not offer admission.
These parents would immediately respond...
"You don't understand, Mr. Doyle!!!! The Psychologists told us that our child's situation is a direct result from the frustration suffered from not getting the help needed to deal with their LD. If we get our child into your school, they will get the help that they need and everything will be fine."
Knowing the raw emotions behind their pleas, it would have been of no help to engage them in a spirited debate. I had to stay firm and explain that we, as a school, would be doing a disservice to their family if we enrolled their child because we did not have the expertise, nor the appropriate resources, to address all of their child's needs. Despite my best efforts, the phone calls often ended with tearful, enraged, defeated-feeling parents.
Countless studies have shown that individuals with LD are at an elevated risk for substance abuse, depression, and delinquency in comparison with their non-LD peers. In more cases than not, many of these LD individuals in crisis did not know they had LD until they were backed into some corner.
When a student acknowledges the existence of LD, it can bring to light a lot of the frustrations experienced over the years. Unfortunately, this new realization cannot turn back the clock and immediately provide relief from other coexisting issues. The emotional/behavioral problems have migrated to the forefront one way or another and now need to become the primary focus of treatment.
Private boarding and day schools for students with LD offer a supportive and nurturing environment that can often help a "fragile" child or adolescent to remain emotionally and behavioral intact. However, this nature and intensity of support and nurturance is not enough to address emergent emotional/behavioral issues. In most of these types of cases, LD Boarding and Day schools for adolescents with co-morbid issues are often not appropriate settings.
Therapeutic Boarding Schools and Residential Treatment Centers can often make academic accommodations for students with LD. However, these accommodations are often not nearly as effective as the academic programming in LD school settings. In some cases, students who attend these therapeutic settings can later attend a specialized school in order to then address the underlying LD issues, but by then they have typically lost a lot of opportunity in the developmental cycle.
So, where does this leave you as a concerned parent? Damned if you do, damned if you don't? Fear not, there are steps you can take; they just need to be more deliberate, more calculated at this stage. You don't have much room for error.
Some Suggestions:
1. If at all possible, do not wait to intervene. Time is not on your side. There are resources you should access whether or not you are planning on changing schools. All research studies show that the earlier the intervention, the better. LD issues do NOT go away on their own.
2. Evaluate or re-evaluate your child ASAP, so you can distill the extent of the emotional/behavioral issues that have manifested alongside the LD. You will need to have a testing practitioner (neuropsychologist/psychologist) administer specific assessments that probe for emotional/behavioral issues.
3. Stop blaming one set of issues on the other. The bottom line is that both exist and need to be addressed as soon as possible.
4. If you are even considering changing schools, make sure you open your scope to those that can work effectively within both issues - the LD and emotional/behavioral struggles. BUT, you also want to keep the balance in check so as to avoid the "catchall" options that claim to treat anything and everything. There are some wonderfully targeted options that achieve the right balance for you.
Posted by Adam R. Goldberg, M.Ed. on Thu, May 14, 2009
The Goldberg Center's extended educational consulting team is pleased to announce that its Founder, Leslie Goldberg, has been awarded the "ISPA Distinguished Service Award" in recognition of her years of work in helping to guide struggling students and their families:
ISPA Announces Leslie Goldberg M.Ed., CEP Recipient of the "ISPA Distinguished Service Award"
April 30, 2009
At the Independent Small Programs Alliance (ISPA) Dinner Meeting in San Francisco, Leslie Goldberg, one of the true founders and pioneers of the Independent Educational Consultant profession was presented with a most prestigious award.
Leslie was awarded the ISPA Distinguished Service Award, by Andy Anderson, ISPA President. This award has only been given once previously in the last 4 years.
ISPA notes - "The ISPA Distinguished Service Award" will be awarded to a Business, Person or Organization providing impactful leadership or global service to ISPA and our industry. This description epitomizes the professional work and leadership of Leslie Goldberg.
Leslie has championed many causes in the provision of service to families in need of educational consulting. Further she has been a tremendous supporter of ISPA. She has spread the word of the important place small programs have in the continuum of educational alternatives and treatment of special needs young people and their families.
Andy Anderson, stated upon presenting the award at the dinner meeting, "Leslie Goldberg is the only two (2) time recipient of an ISPA Award and that her professionalism, intellect and hard work for families, young people and small programs alike have positively changed the face of our important work.
It is the Leslie Goldberg's of the world who have opened new pathways to meeting the difficult needs of those we serve. She is an innovator, fearless in facing challenges and finding solutions to complex problems. We at ISPA are honored to be able to work with Leslie and The Goldberg Center for Educational Planning."